For those moms that feel you never get ME time, sorry girl! Having kids is a different kind of life. It’s time to shift your mindset and embrace the Life of Mom. (not sorry)
You will hear me talk a lot about 5 minutes at a time. When I say 5 minutes, I mean tell Google or Alexa to “Set Alarm 5 Minutes” and do one thing that will make you feel accomplished. After 5 minutes STOP! It’s time to move on to what your kids have been bugging you about for the last four and a half minutes (that’s always the way it goes hehe). [affiliate links]
If you haven’t already, read my First Time Mom Tips to get a reference. These two posts go hand in hand. Not to overwhelm you. This site is directed to do quite the opposite. “I know you can be overwhelmed and you can be underwhelmed but can you ever just be ‘whelmed’??” I tried to search for a clip for this “Clueless” reference – couldn’t find one sorry – It’s still one of my favorite movies!
Adjust your priorities
When you were young and single you could do what you wanted when you wanted. Your priority list probably looked like this:
Now that you are a mom your list probably goes:
It’s time to consciously adjust that way of thinking. I am not telling you what your priorities should be right now but I am telling you that YOU need to be in the top 3 daily. Your list will shift now and then but YOU should always be taken care of even if it’s just for 5 minutes.
That is where my timer comes in. I live my life 5 minutes at a time. I am not saying set a timer every 5 minutes. That would drive anyone CRAZY! When you have something to get done set your timer for 5 minutes and do what you can! You will be surprised at what you can accomplish! The more practice you get the more you will get done in that short amount of time.
At one time our idea of Me time was going to a spa or taking a week-long vacation. Aaahhh Remember those?? Now zen is found in little moments. 5 minutes to reset your brain, be in a different room than your bouncing kids, or just plain BREATHE is the way to keep you from pulling your hair out. Appreciating those things for that 5 minutes is the key. Consciously make the decision saying to yourself, “these next 5 minutes are for me” is the best decision you can make for everyone. Your zen is not unattainable, it is just packaged differently. Set your timer.
Find peace in the little moments with your children. Look at their face when they are reading a book. Watch them figure something out. Remember that they will never be this little again. Creating those memories is part of finding that inner peace you need within the chaos. Snap a picture. I am a huge fan of candid photos. There are a ton of options out there for keeping your favorites. I am getting better about putting them in some kind of organization and eventually I will create a book for each of my children. Each photo with a story, a memory, and it’s all because I took a little time to find my peace in their little face. [affiliate link]
If you literally can not get to anything else that day BREATHE. Consciously breathing has so many health benefits! Spiritually it can make you slow down and get in touch with God. Mentally it brings more clarity. Physically it has a multitude of health benefits including lowering blood pressure and can help lose weight! Getting oxygen into your body makes everything work better and cleaner. If this is the last resort today set your timer for 1-5 minutes after the kids have gone to bed. Tell your wonderful other half not to come in, lock yourself in the bathroom, turn the lights off, sit on the cool floor, close your eyes and breathe!
What about the HOUSE you might ask. Again I say prioritize! 5 minute timers go along way with the house. I allow myself up to 15 minutes with the house BUT I STILL SET MY TIMER! My ideal routine is empty the dishwasher in the morning while breakfast is being made or consumed (5 minutes). Throw a load of laundry in (less than 5 minutes). Get everyone to school and work. When everyone gets home shift the load of laundry to the drier before you sit down. Get dinner started whatever that entails and while it is cooking you do 5-15 minutes of anything else you need cleaned. Start in one corner in one room and wipe, dust, whatever your goal was for that day. Enjoy the kids, help with homework, eat dinner together. The rest of the night is free to enjoy the children. You won’t be thinking of anything else. Time for bed, get the dishes done and dishwasher started (max 15 minutes) as they are getting jammies on and brushing teeth. The only loose end you have to tie up is that load of laundry. Sit down at the end of the night and fold. There you go! It’s enough to keep the basics going. Remember: I said ideal LOL!
Feel like you can handle it yet?
You may think I’m crazy at this point. After 4 kids I ask myself this every day. But seriously 1 minute of breathing and 5 minutes of YOU during the day and you will feel like a new person. A Healthier Mom. Someone who enjoys the moments with the kids, chaos or silence. You take pictures of the strangest things, upload them and keep their story. I promise, when you adjust your mindset, shift your definition of zen, enjoy the little things, you WILL be a SUPER MOM!
You only need to be a SUPER MOM to your kids, their opinion is the only one that matters… oh yeah and also-you aren’t a mom to anyone else!