This is going to get deep so hold your breath. I have talked about setting aside your ME time for mom in previous posts, setting aside 5 minutes when you can and when you need to so you can stay sane. This ME time chat is going to be something different. I am talking about growth. Discovering who you are.
Being a mom makes you a different person. You get super powers that you didn’t have when you were single. When it comes to the children you know the sound of too quiet, you understand when a cough and fever are something to worry about or when it’s something their little body needs to fight, you hear your baby scream in pain from a mile away and are lightning fast and laser focused when they need you. Every one of you moms with any kind of experience can tell me a story of each of these examples but can you tell me the last time you took the time to grow yourself spiritually? Physically? Emotionally? Mentally? Relationally?
It doesn’t have to be a weekend away. It doesn’t have to be even an entire day. You should be doing these things as much as you can. Confession time: I am completely guilty of this… I pour myself into my children and I have lost who I am outside of being mom.
When your babies are small it is very hard to be a separate person. Honestly, you should probably take most of your time to grow as a mom when they are that age, not forgetting you, but your time and priorities are definitely about them. As they get older you should be able to get more and more ME time and focus on your growth in each of these areas:
- Relational with your spouse
I am not going to tell you how to do each one of these things. Maybe at another time we can discuss it. I will say that if you have time for each one of these things throughout the week, you will be better equipped to groom your children for a balance in their lives as well. Teaching them how to have healthy emotions would be really hard if you don’t even know or understand what that feels like, right?
You make You, You
Even though your time and your life revolves around these precious gifts, you still need to be YOU. Taking these little steps will help you continuously discover who you are and who you want to become. I enjoy reading and I think a lot of people do. Audiobooks make it so simple to “read” with whatever you are doing. I like a Best Sellers” target=”_blank”>physical book myself, but I will say it’s much easier to get through a whole audio book, it’s just not as relaxing for me.
Putting on makeup and painting my nails gives me a connection with myself that helps me maintain who I am. I love beauty, it is something that I have always been into so having that little amount of time to spend on myself actually builds my confidence in who I am as a woman, not a mom. What do you have for yourself?
Have a Purpose
Set a specific goal for the next 30 days. If your child is a baby it could be as simple as, I want to be doing the dishes regularly. If they are 2-4 years old it could be that you want to read one book. If they are school aged, you could make a goal to sign up for a class at your community college because you have always been interested in photography and you would like to know more.
You have interests! That is not a question, that is a statement. You may have forgotten what they were but they are there. Choose one and do something related to it. Search for a hobby! It’s OK if it doesn’t work out the first time, in fact I am encouraging you to fail! Failing means you learned something and will do it differently next time. Get a purpose in your life besides keeping the kids alive.
Who are YOU?
Your children continue to grow up. There is no stopping it. You will have full grown adults in the blink of an eye. What if you never took the time to educate yourself on something that you enjoy? What if you never had a hobby? They will be out of the house soon and you will be left alone.
You NEED something real in your life. Listen again…
in YOUR life.
What does that look like for you? How will you continue to grow and be happy when they move on with their healthy lives? Without growth you will be stagnant, you must be moving forward during this time because soon, very soon, you will have to find joy in yourself.
Share with us!
Share below what your next 30 days goal is. Write it on your calendar to come back in 30 days and celebrate with us; Even if you don’t hit that goal exactly how you envisioned it. Share with your support at home AND with our mom community! We will encourage you and help you re-direct.
Don’t put too much thought into it. Its already in your head.
In the next 30 days I will … -fill in the blank no matter how big or small-
You be YOU
Reality is Hard to Face Sometimes
30 Days-Ready? GO!
Above is the link for a year of audio books membership. If you aren’t ready for that commitment and you want a free trial of the audio books to get you going Audio Book Free Trial” target=”_blank”>Click here.
Peace and Balance,